Heres a scenario that I would like your opinion on ...It relates to an "argument" between myself a friend of a good few years about something he posted on a well known Soc Networking site . To give you the background he is gay,has an interest in photography of the male nude,has acertain penchant for guys in uniform or sports outfits and has had a Blog showing male nudes from commercial websites for some years ( although it is being rundown now) ( none of his interests are a secret workwise) . He has recently got a new post in a Medical centre of one of our Armed Services and had a CRB check because of access to medical records .

He recently posted a message saying that he thought it hilarious that his new job involves him getting mobile numbers for hot young sqaddies ..Now,when I saw this I suggested he should delete the message and he disagreed because,as he said ,it was true.I said that whether it was true or not was not the point .What was the point was what other folk who saw it might read in to it incluing his bosses. He suggested that his "bosses" trusted him which was more than I appeared to do and he found that sad and disappointing and said they would have a laugh if they saw the message .I finished by telling him that I could only give him what I saw as good advice and if he chose not to take it then that was his choice .

Now I am absolutely sure that he will not do anything with the info that he has access to but I still think it is better that he had not posted what he did and I still believe that and told him it would be best not to post anything else along such lines .

Am I being overcautious in what I said .I know that in his position I would never have posted that .

I think that you are right but whether or not he wants to follow your advice is up to him.

I would always advise strongly against anybody posting anything that could be deemed inappropiate by their employer.

Molley, I think he's quite a fool for not following your advice if I'm honest.
You are in the right, absolutely.
However, whether or not he chooses to take and follow your advice is out of your control. If it blows up in his face at least you can say that you did try to help.

Agree with the others. Apart from his employers, I wonder what the young soldiers will say/ do if they find out.

Doesn't seem like a big deal to me. I probably wouldn't post it if it were me but it's hardly anything actionable.

While I'm sure your intentions were honourable, you've basically said to him that you think he's incapable of separating his professional and personal interests.

You say you were worried about what others would read into it, but it's clear that what you read into it was that your friend is untrustworthy and shouldn't be allowed near grown men in the armed forces.

Where do you get that from .I said no such thing .My point was what others might read in to what he had said .
What part of "Now I am absolutely sure that he will not do anything with the info that he has access to " do you not understand . It's nothing to do with what I read in to what he wrote nor what he thinks of what he wrote .It's to do with what others might think of what he wrote ....Thats where the danger lies .

i agree others may get the wrong idea... i certainly would be cautious if he had my details after saying something like that

I agree with your point of view.

He's just asking for trouble!

Molly, you're right and he's being stupid, but it's not worth an argument.
Given that your friendly advice has turned into an argument you might want to ask yourself if the "argument" is not really about something else in your relationship with him.

Nah. Its just i see thkngs from a different pov.

I agree with you but he's probably just joking and it's not something, in my opinion, worth getting in a 'tiz about. If he gets in trouble least you told 'em so

gosh you sound like a right busy body. Why dont you just mind your own business?

why you posted that other stuff about him once having a website of semi nude males i have no idea.

you sound like a bit of a jealous spinster to be honest.

Shut up bps, molley is right. Now I'm doing medicine we have to watch what we write on facebook or they'll kick us off, no joke.

With a cavalier attitude like that he shouldn't be in a position of trust.

if I were one if his bosses, far from finding it hilarious, I'd be moving him to other duties pronto.

He's an immature idiot and doesn't deserve your friendship!

Well now ..In reply to (1) so what you are saying is that looking out for a friend is something that friends shouldn't do ?
and as for (2) if you read what I posted and think about it a bit more you will realise that it's relevant to the overall situation .

The matter of right or wrong is subjective and not so much what I wonder about in all this. What actually makes me wonder is why your friend can't take the advice, consider it for a while and do whatever he chooses with it?