There is this guy at my college and I really fancy him but there are two problams.
first one being that he is not out and is still quite indenial. The second problam is he is a
member of staff! This means that even if he did decide that he wanted to go out with me he could not because he would lose his job.

It makes me angry because the funny thing is im actully older tham him! im 19 and hs 18. He works in student services. I really dont know what to do beacuse we see each other nearly everyday and its so hard because we really like each other. We do text each other alot outside of college but he says we cannot meet because he does not what to put his job at risk which is completely understandable. I just wanted to know what you guys think? Do I just forget about him and move on or do I stay in conatct. I dont what to upset him because I was the first person he ever told that he was gay and he says that he wants me to be there to support him and maybe after ive left college in a year we can think about having something more than just a friendship. Now I dont what to sound shallow or spoilt but I just dont think I can wait that long. I mean what if I wait and then its still a no. It will break my heart. I just dont know what to do!

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks

He will know what his rules at work are better than any of us.

If he really liked you, and was allowed to and wanted to come out, he'd probably date you.

I guess if he is gay, he's trying to com to terms with it all.

So maybe the thing to do is just be a good friend.

You clearly like him, you wouldn't want to date him if you didn't, so of course stay friends and see where it goes. Maybe a good friend, possibly dating, there's at least two good possibilities here. However, I wouldn't put your life on hold because of the situation. That's a lot of pressure on both of you. I think it's best to stay open to possibilities. If you meet someone else who you like then see where that goes. You of course run the risk of getting to next year and being the unavailable one then, but that would be more his worry than yours.

If it were me I would meet in scret. I would like to think you would be able to keep it quiet for a year.

It may go no where in that year, or you could step it up afterwards.

This topic needs to win the "most grammatical/spelling mistakes of the year" award . And not just the OP.

Btw, it doesn't sound to me like he's that into you, maybe just needs you more for support etc?

You're 19, do you really want to wait around for something that might never happen? I wouldn't. Just be his friend .

Just wait and be a good friend.

Perhaps he gets a new job some day and then he may want to date you.

But you can never force these things.

Remember what he wants/needs is just as important as what you want and need.

Therein lies your answer somehow.

It might be safer all round to give him time and space, be a friend or be neutral and perhaps wait until you are nearing the end of or have moved on from the college. Student/teacher relationships just seem to end in disaster all the time so you might be averting some grief if you just sidestep this one for awhile.

You never know, you might find a nice lad in the meantime who's not off limits! GL.

Uni is more than focusing your whole life on one hesitant guy you've just met. There's much more to do than that. While you might yearn after him, he's clearly not ready to give it back. If I were you, I'd cool my feelings for him and get out there and enjoy university life in all its diversity. Don't wait for him, why wait? There's lots more to uni life than that.